grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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