Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
dude i'm inner monologue high
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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