I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
