Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
