I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize