Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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