I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize