Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i will never coherently bang her
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
