Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
