i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize