You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Randomize
