I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
