so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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