I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
