I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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