in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
