So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
