Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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