We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Randomize
