loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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