It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
