I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
they're like a gay fantastic four
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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