i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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