I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
