dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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