The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Semen is not good for contacts.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
