another moral hangover. fuck.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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