Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
