dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
