There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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