Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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