Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
