Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
