I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
