my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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