I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
