I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
