tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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