there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
