It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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