Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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