Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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