Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
