Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
