ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
