U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
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