He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
