what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
