i don't plan on having that self control this summer
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
