brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
